Friday, March 4, 2011

Long and Winding Road - One Step at a Time

I spent so many YEARS struggling to get a grip on my weight issues, body image and eating disorders. I started this blog shortly after my 40th birthday and two years later I was even fatter, totally stressed out and absolutely miserable. No matter how badly I wanted to lose weight I was just not doing the things I needed to do consistently enough to make that happen. It wasn't until I got laid off from my job after 11+ stressful years that I had a breakthrough. I got rid of the overwhelming stress of my daily life, I joined the gym and started working out regularly, I stopped bingeing, I started eating healthier foods but didn't give up anything. Nothing was off limits.

Throughout the past 14 months I have indulged in all sorts of so-called "bad" foods. I've had cookies, cake, ice cream, chocolate, bread and everything and anything else I really wanted IN MODERATION. I didn't make myself sick by eating a dozen or more cookies like I had in the past but would have one or two and be satisfied. I started really tasting those treats and realized I didn't want to waste my indulgences on processed, packaged crap that didn't really taste good. I passed up the crap and enjoyed every bite of homemade deliciousness without guilt.

Some weeks I didn't lose any weight, some weeks I only lost .1 or .2 pounds and other weeks I gained weight but I learned it didn't really matter what the scale said as long as I continued to work out and eat right I was on the right road and would eventually get to where I needed to be. I'm not there yet but I'm extremely close. I think I'm right around the weight I was when I first started dieting. How is it that I feel healthy and strong now but it wasn't good enough then? When will we learn to accept our bodies? I know I will never be tall or a size two and I'm ok with that. I don't need to be a certain size to feel good, I just need to keep taking care of myself.

Whether you are just starting out on this road or you're tired from the long journey, don't be discouraged. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and each little baby step will bring you one step closer to where you want to be. Keep the faith and never give up. You are worth it!