Thursday, September 15, 2011

Everything Happens for a Reason

My head has been spinning these days for a number of reasons. I haven't been able to put a coherent thought together in my head let alone get it down on the screen. Everything is jumbled. Nothing in this world makes sense but I know there is a reason for everything.

I was reading stories of 9/11 survivors who, for one reason or another, didn't make it to where they were supposed to be on that fateful Tuesday morning over ten years ago. They missed a train, a bus or a plane, their child was sick, they got stuck in traffic, they had a flat tire, the alarm didn't go off, they stopped to get band aids because their new shoes gave them blisters, so many random events that may have been irritating at the time but ended up being the one thing that saved them. You never know why things happen the way they do but there is a reason for everything.

As we marked the 10th anniversary of the September 11th attacks it drives home the point that you never know what could happen today, tomorrow, next week, next year. We worry about all sorts of things but the most life altering things are usually things we never even saw coming, they just happen. I'm still not able to look at the footage of that day in 2001 without crying like a baby so I avoided most of the news coverage.

To make a somber day even sadder, I had to attend the funeral of my friend and neighbor who had a heart attack the week before, spent a week in a coma and died at the age of 55. She was out mowing the lawn that morning and going about her day just like any other. As you can imagine, everyone is still in shock. A few weeks ago someone I know was hit by lightening in a fast moving storm, spent a week in a coma and then died leaving behind a wife and three children. What are the chances of that?

What I keep thinking is you just never know when your whole world will be turned upside down. Things like losing weight and working out don't seem so important in the grand scheme of things. Being with family and friends, enjoying every minute of your life and putting the tough times in perspective is what we should be doing, not beating ourselves up over what the scale says or fretting about eating some cake and ice cream.

Even though I've been trying to stay focused on what's most important in life, I've been stress eating and having nightmares about going back to work next week. I know it's a good thing. I've had a good run and should be ready to return to the workforce. I know I'm lucky to have found a decent job in this economy when so many others are struggling to find work. Earning a paycheck is very important but as this last week flies by I find myself mindlessly eating when I'm not hungry and worried about falling back into old bad habits.

I'll be attending my last cardio kickboxing class today since the gym is too far away from my new office to be able to make that lunchtime workout. I love that class and I'm sad I won't be able to continue going there twice a week for a good ass kicking. I'm not sure what my new schedule will be like, where and when I'll fit in my workouts or how I'll be able to handle this transition but I need to try to stay focused on what's important.

Even after all the stress eating I've been doing, I'm a mere 4 pounds away from reaching my goal of losing 101 pounds. It has taken me almost two years to get here and I am so thankful to have been given the opportunity to find myself again. I was so lost and miserable and feel so much better than I did two years ago. I need to have faith that I'll be able to handle whatever comes my way because I'm stronger now. I'm not the same person I was two years ago and I don't want to ever go back to that dark and miserable place.

Even though I'm feeling sad, scared and overwhelmed, I realize I really have nothing to complain about. We only get this one life and we should cherish every single moment we can. Change is hard but I'm sure I'll figure it out.

Enjoy every single minute because you just never know what the day or the future will bring.

Remember, Life is Good!


  1. Life certainly is fleeting, isn't it? I agree with your attitude - life should be about spending time with family and friends and doing what makes happy. I have no doubt that you will handle your transition back to the working world with strength and stamina - it is what you are made of!! Just think of the journey you have made in the past 2 years. You are NOT the same person and you WILL find your way and not sabotage all the hard work you have done. Try to take this back to work adventure on the same way you took on weight loss - one day at a time. Eventually you will figure out a plan that works for you and allows you to stay on track. Good luck! I look forward to hearing about this next chapter in your life!

  2. You're so right--life is very short and we really need to keep that in the forefront. Good luck with the return to work!

  3. I couldn't watch too much of the 9/11 coverage. My heart brakes when I think of what the families of the victims went through and continue to go through.

    YOu've worked so hard and you've changed your life. You'll figure out your new routine. But I can understand the stress you are feeling; anyone would feel the same way...

  4. (((((HUGS)))) I'm so sorry you are hurting. I sometimes have to MAKE myself remember that in the end, what I weigh is so very unimportant. What's important is how I show the people I love, that I love them.

    You were in a time of transition 2 years ago and you came out on top, so I have no reason to believe that during this time of transition you will produce any less. You have learned how to make the best of what is given to you, and that is an awesome, awesome thing. You are going to be fine when you start back to work, you will find a way to make it work for you. I believe in you. :)

  5. MB your words today are profound..Yes, we can stress and fret over the littlest of things but it always takes those "you just never know" moments to bring us back to the hard truths of life.
    Yes, everything does happen for a reason and often times we don't know that reason but sometimes we do and those are the little things that we work on everyday!

  6. Life is short. It passes quickly. Everything happens for a reason.

    Yep. So true. All things I've been learning and pondering myself lately.

  7. You are so right! We just never know and, sometimes, it completely blindsides us. Excellent post.

  8. I'm sorry that you are feeling the stress of returning to work. It can't be easy to totally change something that has worked so well for you. I know you can do it though ... it may not be as easy but you have the ability to figure it out. Hugs.

  9. I was just so sad watching all of the memorial coverage, it really takes us back to that day. Those stories that you are talking about are miraculous and sad all at the same time, I wish nobody would have went to work that day, caught their train, plane or bus. Just crazy.

    I hope you are in better spirits!

  10. Congratulations on being so close to 101 pounds off and your goal! That is really terrific!

    I can't agree with you more. Life is so very short. We never know what is around the next corner. But, getting healthy helps you to enjoy it more (like you said). Best wishes to a great start next week to your new job!

  11. 2 years. Wow. That's amazing. It sounds like you're having the kind of year I am. I lost my cousin to breast cancer in Feb. and my ex-husband committed suicide in May. (he was my son's father). It's weird. But you just have to keep on truckin' - as I've so wisely heard. Just know that you inspire me, and I'm sure many others. can't wait to see that 101 pound loss!!

  12. You have a strength I can only dream of. Reading your words a second time convinced me that you're more than ready for what comes next. You always have been, and you always will.


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