If you see the handle of the sharp knife sticking out of my back please pull it out slowly as it's done enough damage on the way in. I didn't expect to be screwed by the one person I thought was on my side. I'm struggling to come to terms with the fact that someone I've respected and trusted over the past eleven years looked me in the eyes and lied to me. He hugged me and reassured me as he stealthily plunged the knife deep into my back. Even after I caught him in his lie and confronted him about it he continued to spin his lie, backpedal and try to throw the blame on others.
I thought we were friends. I thought he had my back and could be honest with each other but it turns out I was very wrong. I guess it's a life lesson I needed to learn. When times get tough you get to see people's true colors and learn who your true friends are. He is not the kind of friend I want to have.
In my head I understand why he did what he did. He was only covering his a$$ but knowing that doesn't make it any easier to swallow. I always thought he was better than that and believed he was different from the rest of them but I was wrong.
It's going to be hard to get through the next few weeks knowing what I know but I'll get through it somehow. I'm trying to convince myself that everything happens for a reason and I'll end up in a better place. Only time will tell.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
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Being betrayed is the worst feeling- it throws me for a loop every time.
ReplyDeleteI hope this person acknowledges what they did very soon and tries to make things right. It's not as good as being honest in the moment but seeing someone behave like that is an ugly thing.
Man, that's the kind of bite that stings!
ReplyDeleteI'm sending you positive, healing vibes and hope that this situation can eventually bring something good to your life - as weird as that sounds.
The truth will always out.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with getting to terms with this. I wish you all the strength and positiveness in the world!
Brooke: I don't think he'll admit his betrayal and I'm so sad he is not the person I thought he was.
ReplyDeleteLAF: Oh, it stings alright. The days are numbered until I'm able to get out of the situation and away from so many ungrateful backstabbers. I was just so disappointed the most about someone who I thought had more class.
ME: Thanks for the well wishes. It's going to take some time to get over this but I will.
Wow. This sounds pretty icky. I had my big 'betrayal' in July and here it is Nov and I'm still in the process o moving forward. I don't know how to tell you but time helps. I listened to some Pema Chodron CDs called When things Fall Apart etc. And her advice helped.
ReplyDeleteNothing is certain. Right. But I was in a bookstore and this man said to me, that instead of thinking of the rug being pulled out from underneath me, I could think of it as a magic carpet ride. So that's what ideally, I'd like to do with life and when people disappoint me. Good luck with this!
lying and betrayal are two of the worst things that people can do to each other in my opinion. I am so sorry that you have to go through this, but hang in there and do the best you can. try to not let this person bring you down even if that might be hard. you are clearly a better person than this person, so dont even stoop to his level and let his betrayal affect you.
ReplyDeleteSorry you have had this happen... I hope you managed to get the knife out! And make sure that you return the favour some time. (what goes around comes around)
ReplyDeleteI HATE LIARS... so much!
POD: Thanks for the CD recommendation. I'll have to check them out. Oh, I like the idea of the magic carpet ride. ;)
ReplyDeleteHeather: I respected this guy for so long and I'm still finding it hard to believe he would treat me the way he did. It's just so sad and disappointing.
Chris: I firmly believe KARMA will come back and bite these b@stards in the ass. I just hope I'm there to watch it.
Clarification: I just wanted to set the record straight - this post is not about B. The backstabbing took place in the concrete box where I spend 40+ hours a week.