Saturday, January 30, 2010

Greed and Gluttony

Ahhhh...sinners have so much more fun, don't they? We covered at least three of the 7 deadly sins today - envy, greed and gluttony.

B and I decided to stay home this weekend instead of going up north since the snowmobile trails are either closed, barely covered or iced over from the warm temperatures and tons of rain. I hope we get some good snow soon so we can salvage the riding season. Too bad all that snow slamming the south couldn't make it's way up to the mountains of Vermont.

To cheer ourselves up we decided to pay some restitution to the Native Americans and make a deposit down at Foxwoods. It must have been the full moon messing with my mind for me to think it was a good idea to throw some money away. I'm still not even getting my unemployment checks but why should that stop me from donating some money to the Indians. We went down hard and fast at the blackjack table but we had a good time and didn't lose too much.

Our friend came down and met us at the casino and after trying a few pulls on the slot machines we headed to Mystic Pizza for a big greasy lunch. I got a turkey sandwich but had some very greasy onion rings, a small sliver of pizza, and french fries. I overdid it for sure.
We hadn't seen our friend since the end of November so we got to exchange Christmas presents which is always fun no matter what the date on the calendar. My friend makes us the most delicious homemade Christmas cookies every year and she had a big batch waiting in the deep freeze for us for over a month. It didn't matter that the cookies have been frozen though because they were just as good as if they were freshly baked. I'm so stuffed but keep breaking off a little piece of cookie here and a little piece there. It really is a sickness when you can't stop eating when you are bursting.

I feel pretty gross right now and almost wish I could make myself throw up. I think lots of people who have a binge eating disorder wish they could be bulimic, at least we'd be able to get rid of that full, bloated feeling and not have so much evidence of our binges hanging off our bodies. I had way too much junk today and feel absolutely disgusting. My stomach is ready to explode and I have a slight headache from all the sugar.

It's funny how quickly our bodies get used to eating healthy foods and when we slip up and go back to eating crap we feel disgusting but we still tend to crave the junk food no matter how gross it makes us feel. Why is that?

I'm going to have to do double time at the gym this week to make up for this one day of excess but it was worth it.


  1. well, back otk tomorrow and don't over do it at the gym.
    Don't punish yourself, you don't want want to get into that spiral.
    Just jump back on program the next day, it's only one day.

  2. Oh man do I know all about overeating then regretting it! Feel like that RIGHT NOW. Darn it.
    HOpe you enjoy the gym during the week, I will think of you while I sit on me butt THINKING about getting some exercise! *sigh*

  3. Keep you head up. Atleast you know what the "problem" is. You know, before I started this journey, I thought overeating and binging was okay - everyone did it. Also, I had no clue why I was gaining weight.

    Atleast you have come to the point of knowing the rights and wrongs of eating.

    A little more effort and discipline this week and you'll be back on track.



  4. Hi. Slightly confused by this post.

    You say "I feel pretty gross right now ... full, bloated feeling ... feel absolutely disgusting ... headache ... "

    and then "but it was worth it."

    I can't understand how it was worth it. Is it really worth it when you feel so physically bad afterwards?

    I'm not getting at you or anything. I just really can't see how it was worth it.

    Bearfriend xx

  5. I can completely relate. I have stuffed myself beyond the point of comfort and yet still kept eating too many times to count. Get right back on program, don't punish yourself.

    Sounds like you had a good day visiting with your friend and playing at the casino anyway. Focus on the positive of the day. :0)

  6. "It's funny how quickly our bodies get used to eating healthy foods..."

    Yes! I went four months with no fast food; when I gave one day because my schedule was "packed," boy did I pay for it!

    As cmoursler said, don't beat yourself up over it: just pick up and start up again where you left off Thursday. :)

  7. cmoursler: Right on.

    Chris: THINKING is a start...maybe go for a short walk on the beach and then sit and think some more about how good it felt to get moving ;)

    JewliaGoulia: There will always be days like this but hopefully the overeating will be limited and learning not to dwell on it will keep me on the right path.

    Friend of the Bear: Eating all the crap and feeling gross wasn't worth it (lesson learned) but enjoying myself and indulging is part of life so that's the part that was worth it. I'm trying not to dwell on the mistakes as they are bound to happen. Maybe next time I'll stop at one or two cookies instead of making myself sick. Baby steps ... Oh, and you are welcome to "get on me" anytime I say stupid things like this ;)

    MsMagnetism: It was all about the fun and the food just happened to be part of it.

    Chibi Jeebs: Hopefully I will learn to remember how gross I feel after eating that stuff and will indulge less and less.

    I'm going to be living at the gym this week. Thanks everyone!

  8. I'm impressed that when some officious annoying people screw you over, your response is to head to the gym. Some people would've headed to the frig.
    Doesn't seem like you need to worry about the occasional fall off the wagon if the gym employees recognize you on sight :)

    p.s. Hope the Unemployment Powers That Be get their heads out of their orifices and straighten things out!

  9. I know what you mean. Once you start living healthy, you realize that you don't want to go back to your previous lifestyle. And your body understands.

  10. Merry: I spent way too many years heading to the frig. and eating my emotions (good and bad) and that never did me any good. Let's hope my torturers give the correct info. to the bureaucrats and get my $$ straightened out.

    All Women Stalker: It's time I started listening to my body instead of that binge monster living inside me.

  11. Hang in there - it was only a weekend, you'll get back on track this week!!

  12. I agree! Don't be too hard on yourself, you know it is NOW that matters! No worries, you will get it back in no time ;)

  13. Hey MB - first I want to apologize for not commenting re: your comments on my blog. I didn't set it up to email me when I had comments so I didn't even know you had visited. In any case, it's great to be back in touch with you too. I miss your quirky writing and stark reality checks. As for your post today, I can SO relate. I have been there - when I've eaten WAY too much but can't seem to stop myself from just having 'one more bite.' It's an illness for sure. I am feeling pretty desperate to do something. I can't stand the fact that food has control over me instead of the other way around. I have wanted to ask you if you're doing any kind of plan or what is it that you're doing? I'm starting to look at the South Beach Diet - it did wonders for Pasta Queen. Take care & step away from the cookies :)


No Sugar Coating Allowed