Nothing is Free

My firm has laid off workers, cut out their 401(k) match and scaled down and cut back many other things but the one thing they haven't cut back on is free breakfast on Thursday mornings.

The Thursday morning feast consists of fresh hot bagels, croissants, pastries, muffins and big platters of fresh fruit. I always try to stick to the fruit and can usually get out of the lounge without grabbing some calorie bomb but the last few weeks I had been indulging in half of a delicious carrot muffin along with my fruit. I knew I shouldn't but I did and it needed to stop.

I'm happy to tell you I resisted the urge to indulge today. I was determined to stay away from those muffins because we all know that muffins, even "carrot" muffins, are just cake in disguise and there is nothing healthy about them. I know better. Some Thursdays I would just eat my regular oatmeal breakfast so I wouldn't be tempted by all the fattening breakfast treats but I needed to work my resisting muscles and just say no. It's hard to pass up something for free in these tough economic times but even if it doesn't cost me money it cost me dearly in other ways.

I'm happy I was able to resist those yummy muffins and just enjoy the fresh watermelon, cantaloupe, berries and honeydew melon instead. I had to stay away from the lounge for the rest of the day because I knew if I went back in there I would be tempted but those muffins. Getting out of there with just my fruit was enough temptation.

I need to remember that just because it is free doesn't mean I have to eat it. It is not calorie free and I would need to pay for it in sweat and tears.

No more free muffins for me!

Hot Sweep

It felt like summer here this weekend with temperatures in the high 80s/low 90s. It was much cooler in Vermont yesterday so we missed sweating it out in the city.

It was only in the 50s when we left the Northeast Kingdom yesterday afternoon but the temps climbed higher and higher as we drove south and it was up to 90 degrees when we got into Massachusetts. Thankfully it cooled down by the time we got to our house so our apartment wasn't an oven. We opened all the windows and got a nice cool breeze to air things out and cool off.

The heat was on at Fenway Park all weekend. It's always exciting to be a sports fan in Boston and there is no bigger rivalry than the Red Sox/Yankees. The Sox spanked the Yankees this weekend taking all three games at Fenway. It's always good to see the Red Sox win but it is so much sweeter when they beat the Evil Empire. Go Sox!

Thematic Photographic - Floral

I wish I were more consistent with my Thematic Photographic participation but somehow life gets in the way and another week's theme is up and I've missed the party. I'm a little late for this one too but wanted to post anyway.

If you want to participate in Carmi's Thematic Photographic project, head over to Written Inc. to get the details and check out his amazing photos. Enjoy!

Happy Patriots Day!

I love these holidays that I get a day off of work but don't have to buy anything or go anywhere. I did say a little prayer of thanks to all the service men and woman, past and present, but that's about all I did to celebrate and honor this holiday.

I was tempted to go take pictures of those crazy people running the Boston Marathon but we decided to go to the gym and do a little running of our own. B and I met Steve and Annmarie at Planet Fitness after breakfast. We got a good workout in while watching the marathon runners on tv.

It is always inspiring to watch the marathon but I don't think I'd ever be able to do it, even if I did get into a serious running program. I am going to try the couch to 5K now that the weather is getting warmer and I can get outside to run. I can't get very inspired to run on the dreadmill but don't mind hitting the pavement and sucking in some fresh air.

I'm still congested and coughing so I was out of breath before I even got on the elliptical but I stayed on for 50 minutes and got a decent workout in. It would be so much easier to get to the gym more often if I had a few more days off from work.

Happy Patriots Day! Oh, and Happy 4/20 ;) Party on.

Cousin Frankie Gets Married

Big Italian weddings are always fun and cousin Frankie's wedding was no exception. Frankie and his bride Angela got married in a small church in Medford so we didn't have to travel far which is always good. It was a nice ceremony but it was a little strange when four or five members of the wedding party started walking down the isle before the music began playing. The church was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop. The organist finally started playing by the time the bride started her walk down the isle.


We actually snuck out before the "I dos" because I could feel a sneezing fit coming on and I didn't have any of my allergy pills with me. We got out of the church before I disrupted the service and took a quick detour to our house to get my medication before heading to the reception.


The reception was held at Venezia's on the waterfront in Quincy. I've never been to this restaurant but I'd like to go back and check out the restaurant for a special dinner. The meal was delicious and I had fun catching up with my aunts, uncles and cousins. Even though most of them don't live too far away, I don't get to see them very often.


I only had one cocktail which was more than I needed since I'm still sick with the cough that won't go away. I'm glad I wasn't in the mood to drink since the booze was $8 a glass. I did a good job staying away from the dessert table. I did have a few bites of the wedding cake but didn't have one cream puff or Italian pastry off the huge table of desserts.


I promised B I wouldn't abandon him at the table to spend the whole night taking pictures like I usually do at weddings. It was hard keeping my finger off the shutter and not running to catch every moment. We didn't stay too late even though we both have tomorrow off (Patriots Day). At least we waited 'til the old people left before we called it a night and headed home.


Of course we couldn't make it through the night without a couple of my aunts asking us when we were going to finally tie the knot. It's inevitable someone will bring up the fact we have been together forever (26+ years) and still "live in sin." I keep telling them we don't want to ruin a good thing and I'm not sure if I'm ready to be a grown up yet.


Best wishes to Frankie and Angela!

Cake Coma

Happy Birthday to my father-in-law who turned 74 last week. He is an amazing man who I adore. I knew and loved him even before I ever met his son over 26 years ago. He's been more of a father to me than my own father. Since he was out of the country last week, my SIL had a little party for him tonight.

I had reasonably healthy portions of dinner and a small sliver of the white on white homemade birthday cake my SIL baked (Mmmmm ... cake ... mmm). It was absolutely delicious and I wouldn't have felt guilty about eating it if I only had that one sliver. We stayed to play cards and after a few hours of drinking coffee and water, resisting all the snack food and watching everyone munch, I gave in and had another piece of cake. UUGHHH! Do you see a pattern here? I certainly do. When will I learn how to keep the sweets out of my big mouth?

By the time we left I felt like my head was in a fog from all the sugar. I was dazed, stuffed and felt miserable. Having a few bad beats in poker and losing money didn't help either (I'm still up from last week though).

I really have to stop doing this to myself. Why do I crave sugar when it makes me feel so crappy? Why do I want it if it makes me miserable and fat? Why can't I just eat one sliver of birthday cake? Why can't I get this sugar addiction under control? There is no doubt I am, and always will be, a sugar addict. Like an alcoholic, I can't have just one.

I know there's nothing I can do about it now except get back on track and work the sugar out of my system. I know when I start eating that stuff it just makes me want it more and I can spiral out of control if I'm not careful. What's done is done and I just have to move on. The only problem with that plan is I have a big Italian wedding to go to tomorrow night.

How do you resist all the food at social events?

Sick Day

I hate wasting sick days actually being sick. It's such a waste of a day off. I can't remember the the last time I called in sick but I caught the nasty cough bug and just couldn't manage to drag my *ss out of bed and go to the office after hacking a lung all night.

I thought it was just allergies when I started sneezing the other day but then I got the sore throat, wheezing and hacking cough just in time for the weekend. It was 70 degrees on the Friday before a long weekend and I didn't even get out to enjoy it. Even though I spent most of the day in bed getting up only long enough to do a few loads of laundry, the day flew by quicker than any day at the office.

I'm off to suck down some DayQuil and salvage the weekend. I can't waste a weekend day in bed.

News Flash

Have I told you lately how much I hate my job?

I can't stand going to my office and dealing with all the sleazy b*st*rd lawyers but I need the paycheck to survive so I go there every day, bite my tongue and count the minutes until 5:00 on Friday. I feel guilty complaining about my job right now because there are so many people out there that are unemployed but I absolutely HATE IT!

I've been searching for a new job for a long time but haven't been able to find a decent position in this tough economy. Most law firms are making major cuts and my firm laid off about 8% of the staff but still expect the same amount of work to go out daily so it has gotten even worse. I hate my job so much I actually asked them to lay me off but they refused to do it. It doesn't aways pay to be good.

I met with a headhunter back in December and he finally got me an interview the other day. It went really well but I just found out they decided to go with another candidate. Out of the dozen or so people they interviewed it came down to me and another woman. The deciding factor for them was she was unemployed so they decided to give it to her instead. I understand their reasoning but I'm still disappointed I can't give my notice YET.

The search continues ....

Stuffed ...

I had a great time celebrating Easter with B's family. There is so much less drama with his family and we can just enjoy the holiday. I did a good job keeping my eating under control through dinner but it was after dinner I got into trouble.


After a very yummy dinner of ham and all the fixin's we cleared off the table to play poker. We usually play tournament no limit texas holdem but we decided to play a non-tournament game today. I did a great job managing my chip stack but I didn't do that well keeping away from all the sweets and treats that were piled around the kitchen.


I resisted the cookies, ricotta pie and other high calorie dishes but I did have some of a fruit/pudding/graham cracker concoction my SIL always makes on the holidays along with some crackers and dip, etc., etc., etc. I couldn't stop picking on stuff all afternoon as we played. By the time I left my SIL's house I was stuffed. UUGHH!

That bad news is that I'm sure I just gained back the 2 pounds I lost this past week but the good news is I have some extra cash in my pocket. I'm determined to get right back on track today and hope to get those two pounds back off AGAIN.

I'm glad there isn't another holiday feast for a few months. It is time to get back to this weight loss business.

Happy Easter!

Hope you all have a Happy Easter whether you are celebrating it this weekend, next weekend, two days ago or not at all.

I'm going to do my best to stay far away from the Peeps (which I don't even like but usually end up eating), marshmallow eggs (I've already had a few of these this past week), chocolate bunnies, jelly beans, Cadbury eggs (icky cream and not even tempting so resisting these should be easy for me) and other chocolaty goodies.

I'm looking forward to getting together with the family but wish it didn't always have to revolve around an all day food feast. I must resist the urge to stuff everything down my throat. It is just another Sunday and I won't use the holiday as an excuse to eat everything in sight all day long. I must resist the temptation and show a little restraint. Just because they only sell this stuff this time of year doesn't mean I need to eat it all. Wish me luck.

Enjoy!

Same Ol' Song and Dance ...

I'm still here, still doing the same ol' song and dance. The dial on the scale goes down a few pounds only to go back up a few pounds. Just thought I'd let you know nothing has changed, I'm still here, still frustrated, still fat, still trying ....

I Lost 100 Pounds!

April Fools!

I won't be fooling when I say the same thing next year. Well, actually that's not true, I don't think I have 100 pounds to lose, I don't think it's realistic to get that low and I don't think it would be possible to sustain a loss like that. I'll be just as happy to say "I lost 80-85-90 pounds!" You heard it here first. By this time next year I'm going to say it and mean it. No foolin'.

I'm not a big fan of the stupid pranks and jokes people like to play on this day for fools. I managed to make it through the day without being made a fool of. No foolin'.

This fool is still working hard to change her binge eating ways, get more exercise, eat healthier and shed the layers of fat from her body. I pity the fool (me) who doesn't learn from all her mistakes. No foolin'.